Why Is Change So Hard?
A Greek philosopher, Heraclitus, is quoted as saying "change is the only constant in life", so why doesn't it get easier? No matter how often change happens, it creates uncertainty, and our reactions are varied. Why? Gabriela Freitas (2019) notes that, “neuroscience explains that resistance to change isn’t a conscious act. Instead, we resist change because of our evolutionary survival instinct and, as humans, we are inherently cautious about change.”
Over the past 20 years I’ve moved homes a lot. Our family moved six times in four years between 2004-2008 and our family moved each year the past three years (2020-2022). When people discover this about me, I see their look of disbelief. I can almost physically see all the questions swirling in their mind with the predominant question being – why?
Moving that many times is a lot and each move had different rationale that resulted in different reactions to the change for each member of our immediate family. Each member of our family was uncertain and resisted different elements for each move. We all focused on how moving impacted ‘me’ initially. Thoughts like:
It’s not my idea
It’s not how I would do it
What if I don’t like the new place?
What if ‘they’ blame me?
Change propels you into the unknown, creates uncertainty and makes you uncomfortable. It's hard.
As the moves took shape, it was not all bad. While we were each nervous at first, for often different reasons, there were positives we each shared. Things like new neighbors that became lifelong friends, less clutter, bigger bedrooms, privacy with a peaceful backyard, smaller spaces that reduced cleaning or maintenance, location conveniences, reduced costs, etc. We each began to understand, connect to the why and grasp how this move shaped our new routines and lifestyle. Each at our own pace too. There were always pros and cons. Being able to pause to identify what was going away and what was starting helped smooth the shift for our family each move.
So, what does this have to do with leadership?
As a leader you're expected to implement change, whether it's your idea or not. Whether this is how you would implement it or not. Leaders are human and it’s okay to be concerned that your team may blame you. Leaders are responsible for managing change daily and that requires you to often lead yourself through the change first. Then you can begin to focus on how you can help your team. It is okay for you to focus on "me" first so that you can eventually lead your team from "me to we" (Andersen, Forbes, 2015).
How can you help your team with change, especially when you don’t have the time to let them get comfortable with it at their own pace? Erika Andersen (Forbes, 2015) shared four key practices:
The power of the pause - remember your own initial reaction. This will help you relate to your team and be supportive of their initial reactions
What’s going away? – identify, ideally with your team, what is ending for them
What’s starting? – identify, ideally with your team, what is starting for them
Smooth the shift – with a better understanding of your team’s reaction to the change you can begin to focus on actions that will help make the change smoother.
Curious about how your team can develop this cultural change practice? Reach out to us here.
References:
Frietas, G. (2019). Organizational Change & the Neuroscience Behind Why We Resist Change. Peopletalkonline.ca. Organizational Change & the Neuroscience Behind Why We Resist Change
Andersen, E. (2015). How Strong Leaders Support People Through Change. www.Forbes.com. How Strong Leaders Support People Through Change (forbes.com)
